been awhile,,,,

it's been a minute right?

Ok, this maybe a quick post for those who follow me here only.

peep the video.

*Juraiordie*

Written in April 29th, 2012...

Yet another birthday post people. 

I've been going thru alot this year, heartbreak, lost of family, lots of inspiration, lots of revamping, and much. 

every year i always ask people to not only never forget me and what i have done, (no YOLO shit) but this year, i'm sure everyone will already live their lives.

to my friends in the music game:

thank you for being patient with me, in due time i will be back in my music faze. so bear with me. thanks for spreading the word of my name.

to my Close Friends,:

i am sorry i have been distant for the past few days, months, weeks, but know i'm continuing to be more stronger and more happier. if you ever showed me love and happiness, i appreciate it truly from the bottom of my heart. the old Yoku will return.

to the two women in my life who i had given my heart to:

Ryoko: i am glad we have each other's respect as friends, and i hope that you find the happiness that maybe i was not able to give you. and even though we are not together but continue to see each other, despite our past, i am glad you have been supportive of my future. that shows how much mature you are than what i had expected. thank you.

Sakuya: This is hard for me to write, because on one side, i am sad that we can not be together and the love apparently is gone, but on the other side, i am upset that you would betray our friendship. no matter how obsessive i seem to be, or annoying, you don't abandon people who have supported you no matter what when they are in a tough situation. that was childish of you to do, (yes, i have every right to say this.) even if i am not to be with you, we are supposed to have a solid friendship. and you are abusing it by completely giving me the cold shoulder. that is NOT the solution. as an adult, you are supposed to TALK about the problem, even if it's repeating. don't worry, i am not obsessing over you anymore, that ship has sailed, my heart is still in part for you, but i am not trapping you. (BTW, i know about you and David your new bf, good luck with that.) in my opinion, i didn't even get a happy birthday, and all i have done for you is not even right. you can act mature, but your not. and i guess leaving you alone is the only way you will see that. no matter how much intelligence you have. even your own friends know what you did to me was wrong, but all i can do is wish you the best of luck. don't worry, no blackmail shit or any of that other stuff. you wont be hearing from me. but know that you did hurt me now, and karma is always in my head. KNOW THIS. no more stalking, (even though i am NOT using a fake page for the record.) no more obsessiveness, no more overwhelming or entrapment as you want to make the excuse. know i have to let you go, until the opportunity comes around and shows you like my friends say, "that you lost the greatest thing in your life."

to everyone else, know this, i will be back to the original mode, and more music is on the way.

to those who wished me happy birthday, thank you. to those who either forgot,or intentionally didn't say anything, meh. no worries, you'll come around. they always do.

~Jurai Or Die~

A Letter To my Dreamgirl......

I'm a simple nerd. I don't have much to offer. I'm new to relationships.
I'm not rich in money, nor am I lavishing at times. Yes I have problems but i am Human. I can't promise you I will have a future with or without you, but I fight for you to make that happen. I can't make you happy, but I would like to be considered for me trying to make you happy. I don't know much about what to say and what not to say, I don't know what to do and not do when your upset and when you want to be alone.
I want you to feel happy, to feel compassionate,and even feel sexy at times, I want you to know that when your with me,you will be always on my mind, every day you wake up, every night you fall asleep. Know I will write songs about you, draw pictures of your beauty, write poems of our love, dream of you, serenade with you, make you feel like your the most important woman in the world to me, Even when you want time to yourself. Know that I want to enjoy every text we give each other, every phone call we have, late night calls we give each other, taking about random things, such as your family, friends, your hometown, your job, even about things that we have in common, like anime, video games, comic books, movies, anything. Know when your gone with friends, I will promise to always be jealous of any man because I want you to know that no man can make you feel the way I do. When you fight with me, I will always be wrong. When we cry, I will always feel compassionate, when your sad, know I will always want to talk to you to understand. I have done all the adventuring I have done, had my fun by myself, I am in the position I want to have fun with you in life. I choose you to make me motivated. To keep me happy, to make me strong. I am happy by myself and with friends, trust me, I love myself, but you can make me feel even more loved. I want that from you. We can go slow in just get to know each other, but I want the chance. I'm not asking for you to love me now, I'm asking for the opportunity to maybe in the future. If you give me the chance. I would like to get to know you, and make you happy, make you feel like the special girl you should always feel. We can just  go from there, i don't mind taking it slow as long as i am given a chance. If your reading this, I just want that chance. So if your interested in my offer, seriously tell me.
This is not an act of desperation, but a bold statement of confidence.
I hope to have that chance.

Thank you,
Raijphinai "Yoku Masaki" Harris

Recovery is almost over...

While its been another while for me to be online thru this blog, I'm in the process of finally feeling like myself again. Its crazy how one person can make me feel obsessive over them when I needed to realize that patience is what I need.
While me and sakuya seem more distant now because she feels maybe I'm not important or other reasons is up to her, but she knows I won't change in feelings for her, and even though its over between us, I still will keep her close as a friend. (For now anyway.) For now I have been keeping up to date with the music.
First off, I have release the first single for "Yoku vs. The world" my comeback album sequel to "the world according to Yoku." And I have to admit, its needed. This project will focus more on my writing skills so not much production will be done by me. (Shouts to DJ sonicfreak for the beat!) Here is the link:

http://soundcloud.com/yoku-the-nightmare/ramona

 Enjoy. Spread the word. And get ready fall next year.
Also I will be reworking some projects I needed to finish including the heavy anticipated project with Melvin Burch. "Tales of lawndale" will now be in motion. Thank you melvin for being patient with me. And keeping me in check. I won't let you down fam.
Also I released the single to Utada Ultimatum 3. I have not confirmed a release date yet. So stay tuned til
then.
http://soundcloud.com/yoku-the-nightmare/tuesday

Also I have started my kickstarter page.

http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1348398224/help-create-the-rave

You know what to do.
Spread the word. Donate. Help me out.

Remember to check my youtube. My twitter (http://www.twitter.com/yokumasaki) my new facebook (http://www.facebook.com/WhoIsYokuMasaki) and also follow me on instagram, soundcloud, and more. Til then stay tuned.
~Jurai Or Die~

EMOtion.... My Closure...

Something i wrote....

"Do I deserve to be here? To exist in this world? Am I just a test from god saying that I shoule be put under a looking glass to be mocked? A chokehold meant to not loved, or adored, or cared? Or should I deserved to be ignored? Is this existence of mine ment to no longer be gain recognition? Or just passed on like it never existed? Like another pasing fade unless something that is important to one that does not care needs something and then is ignored once again?. Should I have to follow and endless cycle of remaining a cellophane despite my unique of a name? Am I doomed to be passed by without a glance no longer? Should I bleed till nothing left to trickle and empty? Will I still be passed by? If my flesh burned, do I deserve to die? If I have hurt one’s heart, should I deserve to be treated like shit? Is it what I deserved from either one or all? I wonder. The days I say I should not exist, when one or many people don’t realize their ability to ignore is making it happen more and more. Its because of this, my request of death forever exists."

if you ever have time, Please listen.



Will stop bugging you since i realize it's getting annoying. plus realized you don't like my pages and posts anymore.

-Yoku

Heartbreak and Recovery...

As many of you may not have known, my "Dating Relationship" with "Sakuya" was ended on Valentine's Day.

if your friends with me on facebook, you may have seen the mental damage it left me, if not, don't bother. don't like bringing it up at times.

in any case i did release #VampireLife the same day, (how ironic i did the project for her and it was now considered a waste.)

and while it turned out as i hoped, it seemed like more of a waste of the time since she ended it with me.

I loved her too much, and became too obsesssive of her.

i don't hate her, i just wished i got another chance.

but i can't.

so with that i took it pretty hard for a few days. and with the last week, i started writing again. funny enoough, Melvin Burch released a couple of instrumental gems and one caught my eye.

wrote the song in about two days.

Now about the song..

EMOtion.

While i did do #Vampirelife in honor of my former Beloved, "EMOtion" does directly relate to her, the only difference is that it deals with the current aftermath i have to deal with because of ending our "dating". i won't go into detail about it cause it's private in some ways. Now i don't know if she listened to #VL , but i don't think she would want to listen to "EMOtion" due to the negative and emotional expression i put into it. but in a way, i do feel somehow she should hear it. i'm confused on wheither or not she should. (many of you i know say that i SHOULD let her hear it, lol) but i will come to that desicion when i complete recording it.

i felt like this record had to be made to make a fitting closure of our "dating" (we technically never had a relationship, because we were "trying things". So that's why it was also never public.) i don't want to bring up more on it, but for those who i feel should hear it will. (Brittany, you being the first.) but i will let you know.

i actually to be honest never expected to go back to the music so soon, cause while we talked, she was my motivation for my music. if it was not for her, "TWATYM" & #VL would have never seen the light of day. Deadass.

To Sakuya, i know you said we should not talk of it, but i had to do the record in order to gain closure. i'm glad we are still friends at least. but know i will let you go, but i still will keep a small part of you near me. cause your strength gave me strength. thank you.

#EMOtion By Yoku Masaki Produced By Melvin Burch.

coming Friday.

*Jurai Or Die*

2012... Year Of Yoku

Man, it's been awhile back on my blog hasn't it?

Well Time to get you followers up to speed.

As you may know or not, I am no longer going by the name of "R.H.The Nightmare"

it seems many people know me more for my other alias than that one, so from now on, i am just, "YOKU MASAKI"

i have also made a new Facebook And Twitter to follow me in

(http://twitter.com/YokuMasaki)

(http://facebook.com/WhoIsYokuMasaki)

also I am at work on a few new projects for this year, but will not be maxing out on releases due to school and money complications.

1.) WTF? Why's That fresh? - A Beattape that was made last year that will be my last for 2011 and for awhile til i get the necessary inspiration. will be out later January.

2.) Ghost Within The Machine - A original Project for me and complexx, but he decided to drop out of it for necessary reasons, now it will be my first compilation album, with songs sampling the "Ghost in The Shell" movies and shows. coming later this year hopefully spring.

3.) #VampireLife - A concept 6 Track EP telling the story of a insomniac vampire Musician who falls in love with a schizophrenic poetry writing Gothic Lolita princess who then get married in a graveyard during the day of the rising dead. will featuring appearances from my lady and Shyce Mayne. hopefully will be released Valentine's Day.

4.) Masterball Jukebox 3 - the third of a Pokemon sampled project, except this will be a compilation EP. the first two were beattapes. coming soon this spring. (shouts to the League)

5.) and finally I will start working on the Sequel for "The World According to Yoku Masaki" it will be called,

"Yoku Masaki Vs. The World."

it will deal with me recording over other artists Records, like a concept remix album

other than that, i have to figure out my money situations, also "The R.A.V.E." and "Kindred Spiritz" are still going to be developed, just on the back burner now.

til then follow me there and all my links as well.

enjoy 2012 while you can.

*Jurai Or Die*